Cereal is an important food here at the Black20 offices. For many of us, it’s our primary non-sandwich form of nourishment. The question is: Which of those cereals has the toughest mascot?

The answer is this week’s list.

10 ) Trix Rabbit – Trix

The Trix rabbit is the worst. He’s been outsmarted by moron kids for decades and he has never once gotten a bowel of Trix. No one would lose to the Trix Rabbit. All he does is give up. He’d throw in the towel before the first punch is ever thrown.

9) Buzz the Bee – Honey Nut Cheerios

You can’t take away the fact that Buzz is a bee and could definitely cause some damage. He can only kill someone if that person/cereal mascot is allergic to bees, but even then there would probably be enough time to get the injured party to a hospital. Americans don’t die from bee stings anymore, except Thomas J. from My Girl. Add to the fact that the Honey Nut Cheerios bee would die immediately after killing his opponent and you’ve got a pretty weak mascot.

8) Snap, Crackle and Pop – Rice Crispies

SC&P are legitimate underdogs as they each appear to be about the size of a tiny mouse. However, this may enable them to sneak up on an opponent and stab him or her with small knitting needles or something. They could also get super maniacal and start speaking in tongues, which may creep an opponent out but ultimately, not enough for them to gain any sort of victory.

7) Chip the Dog – Cookie Crisp

The Cookie Crisp franchise used to have a wizard as their mascot. If that were the case, they’d probably fare better in a throw down. As it is, Chip is a criminal, and that means some experience in a fight, but he doesn’t have anywhere near the skills of the top anthropomorphic warriors.

6) Cap’n Crunch – Cap’n Crunch

Captain Horatio Magellan Crunch is a Navy man. You don’t fuck with a Navy man. Odds are, he has a cutlass somewhere and will cut you. He’s almost certainly faced down pirates. Sure footed and disciplined, the Cap’n knows how to handle himself in a scrape, but a short reach and advancing years mean his glory days are behind him.